It's not (just) about the white dress


The off white Maggie Sottero mermaid or trumpet  designer wedding gown made of raw silk or duchess satin fabric, three tier vanilla wedding cake: simple yet sophisticated, sounds of ululating in the background, Brenda Fassie's vulindlela blaring somewhere in the background, family and friends gathered together to celebrate...


I know many ladies, some of them my friends and others acquaintances, that make it a point to buy wedding magazines every month, are always on top of the latest trends regarding weddings, never miss wedding expos, already know what kind of wedding dress they want, already have their three bridesmaids, already have their wedding cake flavor all figured out, already know the venue for their wedding and have already figured out their seating chart for the reception.  And oh how can I forget, they already have their wedding playlist, ( others even want Judith Sephuma, or Caiphus Semenya and Letta Mbulu to provide live entertainment at their reception) and have already decided on the song that will be played for the first dance.

....the only thing that is left to be finalized now is the small matter of finding the uhm....the... groom. Yes, that's correct, these MegaFaith ladies are either still single not in relationships, or are in relationships but not yet engaged have everything planned and they believe that a worthy groom will surely come their way. In the meantime they will make sure that all the other details are finalized. 

What is the point of this blog entry you may ask? Well I have always had my views regarding the institution of marriage. But I must say in the last two weeks I have been inundated with wedding and engagement announcements from people I went to school with, relatives, old friends etc. In my excitement I congratulated one of these couples via my BBM status update. Little did I know that that very update would solicit the following response: "is getting married to  be viewed as an achievement?" . Now that got me thinking and made me whip out the paper and the pen and start scribbling. 

I would like to consider myself to be a woman of faith. Therefore my point of departure on the subject shall be that marriage is an institution created by God to fulfill certain purposes. This blog entry will only deal with a few.

Partnership 
One of the primary purposes of marriage is partnership. Or, I could more fittingly call it, companionship. When God created us, the scripture says, we were fearfully and wonderfully made, (See Psalms 139:14). Part of our make up is; God DID NOT create us to be alone. He specifically wired us for companionship and declared this revelatory truth when He stated, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.” (See Genesis 2:18). The yearning we have for companionship is part of our spiritual DNA. God designed the partnership of marriage to fulfill that yearning. This divinely inspired partnership was designed to fortify both participants in ways that mere words cannot aptly express or define. One of the ways this partnership fortifies, invigorates, relaxes and pleasures the participants is through sexual relations.  

Procreation 
Another vital purpose of marriage is procreation; the conceiving and bearing of offspring. The Lord God revealed this part of the four-fold purpose of marriage when He released these commanding words: 

Genesis 1:28 
And God blessed them and said to them, Be fruitful, multiply, and fill the earth… 

Jeremiah 29:5-6 
5 Build ye houses, and dwell in them; and plant gardens, and eat the fruit of them; 
6 Take ye wives, and beget sons and daughters; and take wives for your sons, and give your daughters to husbands, that they may bear sons and daughters; that ye may be increased there, and not diminished.

His vision is to fill the earth with righteous men and women who bring forth righteous children, The Lord intended on parents instilling in their offspring – godly morals and family values, (See Proverbs 22:6). His plan is for this model of the family to multiply and flourish until the earth is filled with men and women who reverence and obey His Word. 

Marriage is a continuation of love
Contrary to the pessimistic idea that marriage signals the end of romance, it marks the beginning of a whole new phase of being in love. Marriage allows lovers to enter into a partnership where two halves come together to form a stronger whole and where love evolves into a deeper, more committed relationship.
Marriage helps both individuals to grow
Cynics might continue to harp on how marriage kills individuality and wipes out a person’s personal space. Marriage, on the other hand, allows each partner to explore hitherto unknown facets of his or her personality. Exploring the many nuances of a committed relationship, being responsible for each other’s well-being and meeting the challenges that come in the way, allow each partner to grow into mature and more aware persons.

Sounding board for life:
Of course, one of the greatest points of marriage can sometimes be the fact that you have found someone who loves you no matter what, even when you are irrational, unpredictable, and completely insane, they can provide either an excellent sounding board or a sparring partner.
Marriage is a great source of amusement and jokes for most people, both those who are living it and those who are mere observers. But all jokes aside, marriage is a serious commitment that people take when they are ready to share their whole lives with one other person, and this means all their lives, the good and the bad.

The manifold blessings of being in a union ordained of God are innumerable. You delight in the most glorious, precious, beautiful and purest intimacy known to mankind. You engage in unfettered romance. You experience true love as it was sculptured by God. Know this; when marriage is done right, it is magnificent, beautiful, romantic, marvelous, awesome, exquisite, grand, fascinating, splendid and much, much more....

So yes indeed, he or she who decides to enter into such a union should ( in my humble opinion) be applauded. If this is the course they have chosen and are happy with it then yes once again ( in my humble  opinion) its an achievement worth noting. Because you know what? 

Ok I must admit....that Maggie Soterro gown is mine...and maybe that live entertainment is also my idea...and maybe so is that three tier cake. 

"Marriage is getting to have a sleepover with your best friend, every single night of the week!!! "

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